As a new mom I have found it is difficult to find a balance between my duties and my desires. What I WANT to do doesn’t always mesh with what I NEED to do as a mom. For the first 12 months I sucked it up and tossed the wants aside and focused on the needs of my family. But now that we are no longer breast feeding I have more freedom when it comes to what I can do and when I can do it.
Harrison has been wonderful when it comes to working with me to figure out a schedule that allows us each to do the things we want to while balancing our family obligations.
One of the ways we have done this is by breaking down our weekends into one day for me, and one day for Harrison. Each respective day is one in which we decide what we want to do. Whether it involves the family or not that is our choice. For example, Harrison likes to whitewater kayak which isn’t something he can do with Owen, so he can choose to go kayaking on his day. For me, my day often involves a long solo bike ride or run, whatever happens to be on the training schedule. Sometimes our days mesh and we both get to do something we want, and that’s fine. There are also days where we decide we want to do things as a family so we do. But by breaking the weekend down so we each get to choose something for ourselves it gives us a little feeling of freedom.
We are also trying, and really just started, to make our weeks a little bit of the same. For example, on Tuesday nights there are workouts organized by the Saratoga Tri Club at the Battlefield Park in Saratoga Springs. My carpool partner for work happens to be organizing those rides so it works out for me being able to get there easily. Harrison and I agreed that he would get Owen and they would do their thing so that I could go do mine. On the flip side of that, Harrison has some friends who do mountain bike rides also on Tuesday nights so we will probably alternate our weeks so that he can attend some of those rides when he wants to.
We are slowly working our way towards a good balance of time for ourselves and time for our family. It’s not an easy thing to do and there is always what I call the “Momma Guilt” in the back of my mind telling me I should be home with my family when I am out riding/running/swimming alone but then I remember that if I don’t make time to take care of myself I won’t be able to properly tend to my family either. A little “me” time is healthy for everyone!